Posted in personal, updates

Updates and schtuff

So, um, hi.

Hard knowing what to write after the last thing but I figure I’ll at least try.

It’s getting on that time of the year where my interest in Second Life is flagging. It seems to happen every summer, really. In June there’s a little surge of enthusiasm with the SLB, and then in July I’m off the face of the grid until somewhere around September. It’s not necessarily my depression, in fact I think it’s more likely just the natural cycle of RL activity that gets my attention in the summer. For example, I’m planning our annual RL vacation for July, in which we go on our medieval reenactment event local to the area. Because I’m the head of the Household, I end up doing a lot of the logistical and culinary planning. Not to mention dressing myself and my husband for the occasion.

Another thing that’s got a lot of my attention, I’m pleased to say, is writing. I’ve been pretty inspired lately and I’m trying to get and keep myself on some kind of schedule for writing. And it really feels good to create. Part of me says “I hope it doesn’t suck…” but the other part of me reminds that first part to not worry about it sucking. There’s stuff out there that sucks and still does well. The difference between their crap and my crap is that theirs is done, so shut up and get to work.

There are some developments with himself’s RL work that we’re watching closely. I’m not at a place where I’m at liberty to share more about that because he’s a secret agent and he would have to kill me I MEAN it’s changing too rapidly and is too uncertain for me to share yet.

So I guess what I’m saying is, please don’t be worried if you hear less from me this time of year. Really, I promise, I’m all right. But just in case you are worried, PJ has my cell phone number and anything she has to say is what you should believe. Unless and until you hear The Word from her, I’m safe and content and doing all right.

Posted in depression, personal, updates

The ice cracks

Sometimes ice goes away ever so gradually, melting to water a few slow drops at a time. Other times it shatters, hard, sudden, with a shiver and a crack.

Depression’s like that too. And today the ice snapped and popped. I was thinking about my husband and my cat, and about how much they mean to me, and about how much it would hurt to lose them, and suddenly I felt this overwhelming bittersweet feeling of what himself calls “mysterious sad beauty” so profound that it made my heart physically ache. I cried, a little (I was at work so I reined it in), spontaneously; and I felt like I was alive and that it felt so beautiful to love someone enough to think about how much their loss would pain me.

That’s when I realized I’m not depressed right now. That for now, I’m free.

Posted in day-to-day, Lionheart, updates

Lionheart Festival Plans Roaring Along

The post-Fantasy Faire shindig I’m planning, the Festival of King Richard, is roaring right along (see what I did there?). I’m getting more and more merchants (good ones at that!) and have almost filled my booths. I still have a couple Priority booths left and the rest are the regular ones.

Merchants will set up on May 3rd, and the gates open on May 4th. The festival runs through May 12th. Then clean-up day is on the 13th. And did I mention the quality of merchants? We’ve got everything from eyes to clothing to jewelry to flowers to landscaping to animations and furniture. Many of them will have games like gatchas. We’ve got a food court. We’ve got jousting lined up. Fireworks, storytellers, and a singer too.

If people don’t show up I’ll be pissed.

Tonight I should focus on goods for my own merchant booths, one for Manic Elf and one for Clover’s Kitchen. Clover has been working on some new mesh medieval food to debut. For the Manic Elf booth I got some of the sweetest tip jars you’ll ever see. You’ll want them if you have a medieval village of your own.

So… I should stop yakking. I’ll get something to eat and then it’s back to work for me.

Posted in entertainment, events, Lionheart, photos, RL, rp, updates, work in progress

I get to be Eleanor of Aquitaine!

My Eleanor of Aquitaine costume. For the upcoming Festival of King Richard, coming to Lionheart (where else?) in May.
My Eleanor of Aquitaine costume. For the upcoming Festival of King Richard, coming to Lionheart (where else?) in May.

I love “Archimides” so very much. My RL husband and life’s partner, he is often the voice of reason when I start to getting overwhelmed. Well, planning this festival in May was starting to overwhelm me and I was in full-on panic mode yesterday.

“So here’s what you do,” he said to me last night as we were retiring, “Get a handful of your very closest friends, the people you trust the most, and form a kind of committee. People you know will be there to handle things when you can’t be.”
Continue reading “I get to be Eleanor of Aquitaine!”

Posted in personal, rant, updates

So did you hear the one…

…about the elf stuck in Imprudence? It goes a little something like this.

I have OSX 10.5. For those of you who don’t speak Mac, think of it like running an older operating system like Vista (only mostly functional). In order for the latest MANDATORY UPDATE ERMAGERD SL viewer to work, I need 10.6 (which is, what, like needing Windows 7 or something. I’m trying here, you guys).

In order to get Firestorm to run, I need 10.6.

In fact, in order to get any type of viewer that will show me mesh, you guessed it, 10.6.

Oh, I know what you’re thinking. What about that one (can’t think of the name) that has a Version 1 interface, like Imprudence, and yet has mesh enabled?

Ten. Point. Fucking. Six.

So I’ve been SLing on the only viewer that works for me anymore: Imprudence. Imprudence doesn’t have mesh, doesn’t have prims over 10m, doesn’t have multiple attachments, doesn’t have a Merchant Out Box, but got damn it, it’s the only thing that gets me in world anymore.

Well I try (unsuccessfully) to be one who solves problems rather than bitch about them, so I ordered the upgrade software to 10.6 (or Snow Leopard, as the big kids call it). It arrived Monday (yesterday). I made three attempts to install it when at last I had to call up Apple Support.

Long story not quite as long, the problem appears to be the DVD drive. As it is an older machine, it may be that the lens needs cleaning, the nice lady tells me; she says to get a cleaning kit for it and if that doesn’t work, here’s a ticket number.

Have I ever mentioned that I’m in Boogers, Maine, population 1000 people and 5000 cows? The nearest place to find one such kit turns out to be about 45 minutes drive one-way from here. To afford it, we rolled up change. I’m not fucking exaggerating here, except perhaps the number of people. It may in fact be lower.

So… I go, I get the thing, I come back. Run the cleaner kit.

NOPE. Doesn’t make any bit of difference.

So it looks to be a hardware situation with the disk drive. By this point I’m just starting to think either a few things. Either it’s been a fun five years but time to hang it up, or, it’s time to just get a new fucking computer.

I’d REALLY prefer option B. Option A, while more affordable, is much less enjoyable. Between now and one or the other, Imprudence it is. Not like I was teaching myself mesh modeling or wanting to upload anything to Marketplace anyway (grumble grumble).

Posted in day-to-day, personal, RL, updates

RL Update

Himself is home from his visit in Ohio. Again, I can’t thank everyone enough for their help in making that happen. It was, as well you can imagine, a very bittersweet visit. His mom is in pain, lots of the time, too overcome by pain meds to be lucid, some of the time, and stuck in her bed, all the time. It’s sad, no so much because she’s nearing the end of her life, but that she’s spending this part of it so unlike the feisty “so mad I could just SPIT!” woman she’s been. Alive, but not living.

But he got to visit with her a few times each day he was there, and catch up with his sister and her family as well.

When I think about it, which I don’t, often, it’s not dying that scares me. It’s the thought of being alive but not living.

I’m pro-living.

Posted in day-to-day, updates, work in progress

Elf At Work

Well I have not been idle.

First thing first, himself is going to Ohio on Tuesday, a little less than a week from today, and returning on the following Saturday.

Once again, I can not say it enough, thank you from the bottom of my little shriveled black heart to everyone who’s helped out in any way, great or small or medium.  You’re the best friends an elf could ever want.  I’m truly lucky to know you all.

Himself finally received the paycheck he’s been waiting for since at least May, maybe longer. My reaction was “Woohoo! Let’s have sex on it, right now.” Instead we opted to take it to the bank. But if anyone asks, oh yeah, we totally got some people-on-check action on.

So now not only can we afford to get him out there, we can also afford to get him back. I approve heartily of that.

I’ve also been writing a bit. I’ve been working on a book called Oh The Places You’ll Pillage, intended originally as a gift for a young friend of mine with a viking persona who’s going off to college. And, I’m starting a (very) vague script for a full-length action-adventure silent film. Working title: Dr. Dangerous and the Eye of Bast. Very exciting stuff. That is, once I figure out just what that stuff will be.

Blackberries are starting to ripen, IRL. I snack on them regularly and put them on my cheerios in the morning. It’s one of those small free joys that makes living here tolerable.

Posted in building, community, events, mesh, party, SL9b, updates, video, work in progress

If it’s all the same, I’ll go with Cake, thanks.

So, this is it! Opening Day is Monday. I THINK it’s all ready to go. The only thing I don’t know the status of is the balloon freebies game, and I’m going to try not to stress over it because if I’m stressing about a balloon freebies game, then I need to go find something else to stress about.

Maybe I could try to invent some stress and drama. But then I’m no Hamlet.

The Cake is FRIGGIN’ AMAZING. You may or may not recall from SL8B last year, the very popular and widely acclaimed “Together” exhibit by Mikati Slade. Well I’m very excited to see her work as this year’s Cake Stage. It spans 4 whole sims and it’s in-friggin’-credible. The photo doesn’t do it justice. WAIT TIL YOU SEE IT.

Speaking of things I can’t wait for you to see: this.

Oh wait I’m doing this wrong. Um… CONTROVERSY. DRAMA. STUFF.

Look, Hammie, I know you want SL9B to be a drama-and-lag fest, just like you say SL8B was. You’ll even go so far as to mention a build that most of the other builders/staff/participants never even saw. I notice, though, that if not for (invented) controversy, there really isn’t much mention from your blog about SL9B at all. Perhaps you don’t find it newsworthy that residents, and not a single Labbie, ponied up land, donated their time and work, and did everything all on their own. Perhaps you don’t find it newsworthy that there were more applicants to build at this expo than at any of the previous ones. Perhaps you don’t find the beautiful Cake Stage, the underwater exhibits, the giant airborne stage made entirely out of mesh, worth mentioning in your news blog.

But I do. I’m fucking well impressed. No, awed. I call myself an event planner but bitches I can’t even BEGIN to fathom what went into making this whole thing come together. I consider myself truly lucky to be just a tiny little cog in this whole mechanism, and I will never, for as long as I live or rez, forget this event.

Tonight the gates close. Tomorrow, to de-stress, Petal and friends are going pillaging. Then, Monday, bring on the cake and the Death. I am so ready.

Posted in business in SL, Clover's Kitchen, list, Shopping!, updates

Monthly Shop Chores (Done!)

Whenever the calendar flips over I make sure I get all my shop chores (mostly) done and this month was no exception. Anyone who ever says that a SL business isn’t work is either a damn liar or so clueless they don’t know how much money they’ve lost yet. Admittedly it’s not as much nor as demanding work as in RL, but my whole day “off” was spent doing work for my virtual shop.

I’m able to cross the following off the to-do list today (not necessarily in order):

  • Total up my net sales for October (by the way: more than double last October! Woo hoo!)
  • Start a new spreadsheet to total up November sales
  • Send manual invites to the shop group to all the latest customers (this is really more a weekly or semiweekly chore for me)
  • Take down the October (read: Halloween) decorations in the shop
  • Put up the November (read: Thanksgiving) decorations in the shop
  • Change over the Seasonal vendor in the shop to November
  • Make two new items: Green Bean Casserole and Pumpkin Spice Tea
  • Get aforementioned items photographed, boxed, loaded into the vendors, and listed on Marketplace
  • Sent out weekly group announcement about Guy Fawkes (Nov. 5th) and Jacket Potatoes
  • Got said Jacket Potatoes listed on Marketplace
  • Paid the shop rent
  • Blogged about it all just now!

Fortunately, thanks a million to Miyo’s awesome tutorial, my Marketplace uploads are automatically Tweeted as they’re created, saving me a ton of time there.

The other part that was easy and not a chore at all: made a few thousand Ls in sales. 😀

So, yeah. I started at about 11-ish AM and I’m wrapping it up at about 11-ish PM. It’s time to punch out.

Posted in building, business in SL, day-to-day, Happy Ass Pub, money, personal, rant, updates

Right. It’s “later” now.

Me before opening the Happy Ass: I miss having a pub to go to! I like Irish Music and sipping a virtual pint at the end of the day. I can build and decorate real good. I’ve come into some disposable Ls. WHY THE HELL NOT?

Me now: Oh yeah, THAT’S why. I’m working RL full time so I don’t have time to devote to managing this place or even to have a DJ set of my own, except Tuesdays at 4PM (and who the hell is even on then, besides me?). I got one DJ yelling constructively and continually suggesting at me to “advertise more” (sure, as soon as you tell me where that money’s going to come from and if it’s actually even worth it to spend) and here I am coming away with the impression that she’s blaming me because nobody’s on to listen to her set on a mid-week mid-day.

Let me break it down. Take the (very small) number of people who are even on SL at this particular time. Now, of them, take the percentage of people who are interested in the same type of music (of which, I’ve admitted, I’m not even one!). Now, of them, narrow it down to the number of people who aren’t already busy either building, sexing, or attending to some other commitment. Then, just to make extra sure, remove the griefers who are already on the ban list (of which there are maybe a half dozen).

This is not my fault here, and pumping cash into some “ad board” somewhere won’t fix it.

Further, Mondays and Tuesdays are my two days off from RL work. I feel as though if I log Mistletoe in, she’s obligated to be at the pub. Clover has once more become my “shut up and let me build stuff” alt.

But, long story short. I’m not having fun, I’m feeling overwhelmed by commitments I’m losing interest in (and am thus avoiding), and I’m paying for the privilege.

How about no.

I could just as easily sit on my butt at home and listen to Irish music or watch TV or have friends over, and I could do it for less money and without being told how to do it.

So, I’m closing the pub. I may refurbish the building as a house, but chances are more likely I’ll use the red house I built some time back and rather like. Very rural/suburban New England looking, with plenty of room for the whole family.

And as a note to myself: Laura, don’t do this again. Patronize a pub what already exists.

Further edit: not surprisingly, the shit hit the fan over something I had said.  I’m not blaming the DJ or my frustration or the closing of the pub on her.  If I was unclear about that, I apologize.  However I do have the right to be upset, and I do have the right to say why.