Posted in blues, building, business in SL, entertainment, fuck you LL, humor, I wrote this, music, rant, Shopping!, song

Work Around

Work Around

(by RayCharles Linden)*
(Original tune: “Mess Around”, Ray Charles)

Blues Brothers Night at Hotlanta Blues, Feb. 2009

Aw you can talk about the new Marketplace
Where the descriptions don’t match the face
ahh, Work Around
We doin’ the Work Around
Do the Work Around
Ev’rybody do the Work Around

Nobody was rezzed, you can bet your soul
Waitin’ for the restarts to start to roll
We Work Around
We doin’ the Work Around
Do the work Around
Ev’rybody do the Work Around

Now the office hours are from noon to one
Nobody ever gonna get stuff done
So we Work Around
We’re doin’ the Work Around
We’re doin’ the Work Around
Ev’rybody do the Work Around

Now see that girl with the extra bling
She’ll make a laggy mess of everything
So we’ll Work Around
We doin’ the Work Around
Do the Work Around
Ev’rybody do the Work Around

*(not really. It’s by me, Mistletoe.)

So, yeah, still not having a lot of luck getting shit working at the Marketplace. So, I’m working on finding a way around it. Wish me luck.

The plan is: all the erroneous listings that are in the Magic Box, I’ll relist with DD, and vise versa. We’ll see.

Posted in day-to-day, humor, I wrote this, music, song

Anthems for Second Life

The deadline is coming up for the SL Anthem Contest, you guys.

I’m not taking part. For one thing, the lyrics are already written, and that’s the part I’d have any shot at being good at. I’m not a composer. I’m the kind of composer that would make Mozart go, “and then it’s just the same thing, right? It doesn’t really work, does it?” and he’d laugh his insane goofy laugh while composing circles around me in that lavender crushed-velvet coat (which, nothing to do with anything, I want).

'It doesn't really work, does it?'

Additionally, you not only have to compose it, but you have to record it. Do you know why there are no Cat Agus Cu recordings? Because a certain elf who will remain nameless (but whose name rhymes with “This’ll Go” ) is phobic of recording. I have a grand total of ONE existing recording of me singing, dating back to 1994.

And even if I were to compose the perfect melody, get my chicken-shit ass into a studio, and somehow win? I’d win under $200US, if I’m doing my math right. Call me a greedy bastard, but for all that, I want a little bit more to show for rights to something I composed.

It does get me thinking, though, that SL really could use an anthem. I’m just not sure the lyrics proposed for the contest are it. So I sat me down and tried a few possible anthems, to the tune of already existing ones.

Rod save our awesome sims
Rod save our pretty sims
Rod Save Our Grid

Lags are notorious
Load times laborious
But it can be glorious-
Rod save our Grid!

I figure, being a Yank myself, maybe I should write something to the tune of our own national anthem:

O Say can you see
By your eighteen face lights
What so proudly we built
After six months of dreaming

Bold sculpts and big prims
Of improbable height
On the screens you can watch
Diff’rent videos streaming

And the textures so fine
Perfectly in a line
Give proof you can see
of our awesome design

Oh why is this outsanding
Parcel still gray…
I’ve been here half an hour-
Rez sometime today!

Of course, I try to be a citizen of the world…

Allons, enfants de la Teen Grid
Le jour de fusion est arrivée!

Actually I don’t know enough French to continue that one.

O, Second Life
My home and virtual land
My kids and wife
Say it’s gotten out of hand…

I don’t know O Canada well enough to scan beyond that one.

Anyway, those are my humble contributions to the idea of a Second Life anthem. What have you got?

Posted in day-to-day, humor, I wrote this, love, rant, Real Avatars of Genius, relationships, song

Real Avatars of Genius

Once again, Black Magic Unspillable Stout presents: Real Avatars of Genius!

((singer): REEEEEAL AVATARS OF GENIUS!)

Today, we salute you, Mr. Virtual Stalker.

(MIS-TER VIR-TU-AL A-VA-TAR STALKEEERRRR!)

In the land of pixels, breaking into someone’s house to watch them sleep just isn’t romantic enough for you.

(EDWARD YOU SPARKLY STALKER-ASS FREAK!)

Getting someone’s name tattooed all over you like this guy just doesn’t work the same.

(RUN, BRENDA, RUUNNN!)

No, you, Mr. Virtual Stalker, you are on a whole new level of batshit crazy. Your tenacity is the stuff of legend. The word “no” is simply not in your vocabulary.

(AND NEITHER ARE THE WORDS ‘MUTE’, ‘BAN’, OR ‘RESTRAINING ORDER’)

You know it’s simply a matter of time before the object of your attention comes around, and sees how perfect for them you are.

(WHAT’S A CALENDAR YEAR–OR TWO OR THREE–WHEN LOOOOOVE IS ON THE LINE?!)

You know that right now they’re just giving you secret messages, holding back the way they really feel about you.

(YOUR LIPS SAY ‘LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE’ BUT YOUR EYES SAY….)

And you’re so tenacious, in fact, that if your prey–er, true love–shuts you out, you know you’re only a few clicks away from a spy and/or sockpuppet.

(WON’T SHE BE SURPRISED…)

Never mind that your true love can see right through it.

(IT JUST PROVES SHE LOVES YOU… SOMEHOW…)

Never mind that you had to lie through your teeth just to get her to talk to you. After all her trusting nature is just one of those things you adore about her.

(WRITING A BOOK MY PALE ELFY ASS!)

While a normal person would consider spending months or years buzzing around someone wasted time, you know that a moment spent aggravating someone in the name of love is never wasted.

(SERIOUSLY GET AT LEAST ONE LIFE ALREADY)

So here’s to you, Mr. Virtual Stalker. YOU are a Real Avatar of Genius.

(REEEEAL AVATAR OF GENIUS!)

Posted in day-to-day, I wrote this, music, OpenLife, song

The Content Creator (song)

(c) 2009 L. Foster
Tune: “The Moonshiner”, Irish Traditional

(chorus:)
I’m a builder, I’m a scripter
I’m a performer too
This whole grid was built
by the things that we do
(I’m) done lining your pockets
With my hard-earned cash
It’s off to a new grid
Where I’ll rez till I crash

I’ve been an SL-er for over a year
I’ve made stuff from clothing to houses to beer
I pay for uploading, I pay when I sell
I pay for my land and to cash out as well

(chorus)

I’m taking my talents to a new count-er-y
I’ll sell all my lindens and go on a spree
I’ll get my own region for a quarter the price
And with triple the prims it’ll surely be nice

(chorus)

Oh Lindens, oh Lindens, how did I love thee
But you’ll never rest till you take all from me
So bless content makers and buyers of goods,
For you ne’er more will see me in this neighborhood!

(chorus)

Posted in I wrote this, love, music, personal, relationships, song

Tell me

I don’t know when it happened
Can’t put my finger at the start
But by and by it got to where
I’d let you in my heart
Maybe that first and only time
your lips had met with mine
And now today I burn inside
Every time we part

It seemed so very simple
I was always in control
Lonely nights and secrets
Began to take their toll
And fear and fantasy
Got their hooks in me
This love’s become a cancer
And it eats into my soul

(Refrain: )
Just tell me
Tell me you don’t love me
Tell me you don’t want me
It’s all you have to say
Then I can break free from this chain
Begin to heal from all this pain
And if it isn’t true, just say it anyway
Tell me that you just don’t feel that way

Some day I hope you’ll understand
Just why I had to leave
I never meant to hurt you
Never wanted you to grieve
It’s more than just a game
This poison love became
I won’t let it destroy us both
And it would, I believe

So (refrain)

(c)2009 Laura Foster