Posted in Alts, day-to-day, humor, I wrote this, northfarthing, raving

My favorite n00b comeuppance moment…

[13:48] Clover Windlow: ((OOC)) Ok funny storry.
[13:48] Clover Windlow: I-as-Mistletoe am making the rounds in Northfarthing
[13:49] Clover Windlow: and a couple of noobs have let themselves into [name]’s castle and were helping themselves to her bed
[13:49] Clover Windlow: so I ride up under the window and hear that they are in fact speaking Italian
[13:49] Clover Windlow: so I throw on a translator and tell them they have 10 seconds to get the hell out of the private house
[13:49] Clover Windlow: They totally ignore me of course
[13:50] Clover Windlow: So I kicked just her
[13:50] [redacted]: lol
[13:50] Clover Windlow: and since I had the translator on I could tell he said
[13:50] Clover Windlow: “Oh, yes, so beautiful… where did you go?”
[13:50] [redacted]: lol
[13:50] Clover Windlow: by this time the sim owner is there too, so he’s hearing this all
[13:50] Clover Windlow: now if there is any kind of benevolent SL god
[13:50] [redacted]: oh dear, that’s a good one
[13:51] Clover Windlow: then I kicked her to a newbie infohub
[13:51] Clover Windlow: where she arrived, nekkid as a jaybird, dryhumping the air
[13:51] Clover Windlow: I don’t know if that’s where she went but I like to imagine it that way
[13:51] [redacted]: *evil snigger*
[13:51] Clover Windlow: Some noob walking around “Where cna I to get teh sexxx?” *poof*
[13:52] Clover Windlow: “Best game ever!!!”
[13:52] Clover Windlow: lmao
[13:52] Clover Windlow: I says to the sim owner, hey boss, I learned the Italian word for cock, wanna know what it is?
[13:52] Clover Windlow: so now here’s the guy, his gf gone
[13:53] Clover Windlow: authorities outside, mocking him
[13:53] Clover Windlow: He disappears in a hurry
[13:54] Clover Windlow: never saw them again
[13:54] Clover Windlow: Christ I miss that sim

Posted in day-to-day, love, northfarthing, personal

Love is a Verb

Or, an Elegy for a Sunken Island

It was the place I called home for over a year. It was a responsibility I took, with all my heart, for no reason other than love alone. But it was never mine. One could call that symbolic, perhaps, or a parallel. Call it what you will; I loved that fucking sim. Through drama, through loss, through tournaments and festivals and quiet times and embarrassing moments and goofy grief-fights, there was no single place on the entire grid I wanted to be more.

I get a sinking feeling every every time I see “Message from Second Life” as a subject in my inbox, because it inevitably means that more pieces of me have been sent back, and that a little bit more of the product of my love is gone.

When the day came that I broke the news that I was leaving, I was told that I was the one holding it together all along. But that’s part of the reason that I had to leave: it was never mine to hold together. Whether intentionally or not, so much of the me that went into that sim was taken for granted. I don’t mean by the populace at large. I mean by the person whose sim it is to hold together. It was a burden I could bear no longer. Some might say I was a quitter to turn my back on it. Others, that I was a fool for putting so much into it for so little in return.

But you see, I’m of the belief that love is a verb. When you love someone, or something, or someplace, you actively invest in it. You support with your whole being, expecting nothing in return except maybe a little love in return someday. You say, “I am on your side,” partly in the hope that one day it will be on your side. You make foolish decisions. You rise and fall and rise again. You bleed and you heal.

When you love someplace, you don’t just ignore it and expect it to take care of itself. You don’t sit silently and hope that someone else will come along and bring the “good old days” back again. Just like you don’t sit silently and hope that someone dear to you already knows how you feel, day after day after long day. Blame whatever you wish for the decline of the town; the true reason is that you who have it stopped actively loving it a long, long time ago. Somewhere along the line it changed from your home to that place down underneath your new home, and it was obvious to every resident or merchant that came and didn’t stay. Maybe you do still love it, in some way. But nobody would know that, to set foot on its grounds. No one. Just like I never knew you cared until the day I said I was leaving.

Love is a verb. Love the sim, actively, love the people who come to it, love the scenery and the buildings and whatever little else remains, and maybe it can be said that there is a future for it.

But deep down I think those days are gone.

Posted in building, day-to-day, Mistletoe Creek, northfarthing, OpenLife, out of character

Can you go back home again?

So. Had a look at Northfarthing. Or at least the sea around said, in the bottom of which I rezzed, where once the inn stood.

That’s done, then.

So I’m wondering if the time has come to put Mistletoe Creek on the back burner, before people start moving in and getting attached to it. I haven’t had time to log into OL at all, let alone do anything with the sim. And I just don’t have the love for it I expected I would. And OL is still very much Beta, and I don’t know if I’m in a Beta mindset just now. There’s all these changes coming and I hate the idea of making an investment of time and energy to just have to start all over again. Not that I’ve had time to invest.

It may be the mood I’m in for the time being, I don’t know.

I’ll probably be more eloquent when I’m better rested.

Posted in northfarthing, personal

Farewell letter

My dearly loved people of Northfarthing,

It’s after some painful soul-searching and deliberating that I’ve finally come to the decision to move out of Northfarthing. This was an extremely difficult decision; Northfarthing was my very first ever home in SL and has been for over a year now. Please do not think that I have any hard feelings or ill will toward anyone in NF, because I absolutely do not. This is something I’ve gone back and forth with for some time now, and now I realize it’s what’s best.

I’ve found some new land to call my own, where Clover’s Kitchen will build its new large main store and my family (ok, multiple personalities) and I will call home. I’m also making a wee little Irish pub I plan to call the Cat and Dog. I’m always an IM away, wherever my pixellated feet may take me.

And know that just because I’m moving away doesn’t mean I’m leaving for good. I don’t wish any bridges to be burned; as I said, I have zero ill will. There’s a portion of my heart that I’ll never get back again, because it will always be in Northfarthing. So I plan to come around and tend to it when I can. 😉 And, I hope sometime you’ll come and visit me as well!

Amysthand nuld nawonana chrahi wish – the limbs of my heart enfold you, now and always.

Posted in day-to-day, love, northfarthing, personal, relationships

The Human Side of the Elf

For as long as I’ve been in SL, I’ve been an elf. I couldn’t just spell out why I made that decision, just that it’s what I’ve always been and what I’ve always felt like being.

This evening, I let a couple people see a more human side. I’ve said before, the hardest thing for me to let people see is Someone Who’s Hurting. I’m much more willing to show a pixellated nude body (after all, it’s not my own) than anything resembling coming apart emotionally.

Tonight a friend asked me in IM how I’m doing in RL, and I just started crying instantly. She didn’t see or hear it at the time of course, but there was something powerful and liberating about it. Like I was given an invitation to be me, myself, not my character. It’s still terrifying, however, to bring RL me into SL. I do SL to make the time when I’m hurting (physical or emotional) go by faster; a kind of anesthesia for when RL gets, well, like mine has lately.
Continue reading “The Human Side of the Elf”

Posted in Cat Agus Cu, day-to-day, music, northfarthing, performing, personal

No outpouring? Good.

I’ve gotten a handful of really thoughtful IMs from folks who have enjoyed Cat Agus Cu over the months, mostly expressing sadness that we’re retiring from playing in SL but simultaneously expressing sympathy for our doing so.

Part of my ego was hoping for an outpouring of outrage and gnashing of teeth at our decision, but the truth is I prefer this. We have a handful of really devoted and appreciative fans, who see us as people and not as a product, and that’s truly a thing to be thankful for.

It’s also a confirmation that we made the right decision.

Now just for the record, the band itself is not dissolving. Someone asked if we might ever play in SL just for fun, and I can’t predict the future so I said it’s not outside the realm of possibility. We’re also talking about putting a little something together in the way of a recording for Christmas, but haven’t committed to it.

Also, a friend asked why I didn’t make an announcement yet that I’m cancelling plans for the fall festival. It’s because I never made an announcement that there’s going to BE one, except to a group that doesn’t even exist anymore. Furthermore there can be a fall festival. Someone else just has to make it happen is all; I’ve burned bright and vivid and then burnt out, like the fireworks we just got. I’m still convinced the grid will NOT spin off its axis for my having done so.

Posted in northfarthing, photos, raving

The Good Guys Don’t Always Wear White

deputymist_001

“We are a society of law and of consequence, and if someone’s going to do something that’s both immoral and illegal, then they should be prepared to… oh crap. I am Lawful Good.”

I rarely get an opportunity to buy clothing, being a busy government official and all 😉 . Between time and money, new clothes are truly a luxury for me.
Continue reading “The Good Guys Don’t Always Wear White”

Posted in events, northfarthing

Fellowship Games Scrapped–kinda

Due to thundering lack of interest (much of it on my own part), the Fellowship Games aren’t going down as originally planned.

Instead, on September 19th, we’re going to have a festival in Northfarthing. Live (and mostly live) music, some tourneys, shopping, and fireworks. It’s looking to me like for the most part people want to be entertained but they don’t want to work for it. Well and good. I can adapt (given enough notice).

Posted in Alts, child avatars, day-to-day, medieval, northfarthing, out of character, roleplay, roleplaying, rp

Medieval/Fantasy Kid Avatars? *Heads Explode*

I am thinking I want to make things for kid avatars.

This one’s really going to boggle people’s minds I’m sure. In a world where more people question the will to be a kid than the will to be a slave, the idea of kids in a medieval/fantasy RP type setting is sure to set a few cerebral cortexes to critical mass.

A few years ago when I was flipping through the dials, I saw one movie version or another of Beowulf. Goodness knows there are tons, none of them that good (some more tolerable than others), so I’ve no idea which one it was or even how true to the original work it is. In the scene I was watching, Beowulf and his men arrive at a village and realize that something is amiss when they discover that there are no children in the village. None. It’s an eyebrow-raiser, even in an epic violent saga, for there to be no children in a medieval society (or for that matter in any society, but what we’re talking about now is this particular type setting).

The Seven Isles sims, bless ’em, have a kids’ group. THIS IS ME SHOUTING OUT TO YOU. You guys rule. I gotta remember to get Petal’s paperwork out to you folks. I gotta remember to pick up paperwork to do up, heh.

So. I want to make some medieval/fantasy kids’ garb. And skins (if nobody else will do it, damn it, *I* will!). And Stuff. I’ll add them at my leisure at XStreet.

As it stands now, one lonely (and increasingly bored) young ‘un lives in Nortfarthing. It’s a start.